What Else is New

Today has been the absolute shit I have to admit. I did manage to cop a dilaudid before work and a quarter worth of speed but neither one seems to have any affect on me today for some reason other than the fact that I am feeling kind of sorry for myself. My dealer has my car so I might try calling her to see if she will drop something off to me. Like that is going to happen.

Like nothing is going to happen of course. She said that she is out of everything so must be true - yeah, whatever. Like I am not an idiot. Pisses me off that she will take my car and when I want something delivered to me, she couldn't be arsed. This just bugs me so very much. I know that I don't have any money right now but she has my bloody vehicle so that should be good enough. She knows damn well that I am good for it too. I want to go home from work too but I know that if I do I will be in deep crap here cause I think that I have pretty much used up my welcome as far as going home early, etc. Well I guess that I only have 3 hours left but even that seems like an enternity right about now. I feel as if I am going to upchuck what little I have in my stomach right now. Whatever. Sucks to be me right now that is for sure.